1 year and "I'm still standin'..."

I can't believe that 1 year has passed since my diagnosis. Well actually, it was around 6:30 pm tonight that I got the news. What a year it has been. Chemotherapy, radiation, scans, tests, tons of doctor visits, and all the side effects of treatment. All in all, it was not too bad. I was able to teach Taekwondo classes through my treatment - I only missed/did not teach 4 out of 64 possible classes due to my treatment (I was there but did not teach, I was too tired) and another 4 classes due to being out of town, so I taught 56 out of 64 classes during my chemotherapy -- not too shabby.

My general physician said that it is common to get depressed and/or angry around the 1 year mark. The worst has passed and you can sort of sit back and take it all in, and then it hits you. The reality of everything you have gone through and the fear of what my lie ahead. I can identify a little, I do find my self contemplating the last year quite often. It is very scary to think about the Cancer coming back. But rather than fear, sadness, or anger, I feel gratitude and hope.

Today, I am pretty much back to myself. I still get tired quickly and take longer to gain my energy back. Also, it feels like no matter how much I sleep, I can never get ENOUGH sleep. I do no have a minimum energy level - unlike before when my minimum was ZERO!! I can also tell that my endurance is coming back slowly. However, I am having to re-learn to not push myself because I can't just "push through" tiredness like I did before. I have to get enough rest or I cannot function.

Looking back, over the last year, what have I learned? -- I have a wonderful, supportive family that loves me VERY much. I have fantastic friends who are there for me when I need them. I have created a diverse yet close-knit Taekwondo school where the parents & students care about one-another and are understanding and supportive of me and the school as a whole. Most importantly, I am pretty happy with where my life is, AND I can steer my life in the direction I want with a little self-discipline and a little effort/work each day.

Thank you for all the prayers, support, and love over the last year. I am looking forward to many more years ahead.